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Ennis was not, thinking his mind was totally mess; the pain of being rejected by Jenny was more than enough for him. The day was following his pain, the sky was as grayest it could be and the lightning were seizing the earth. Ennis ran and ran he was not listening Junior calling him he want to go home he want to be back with Jack.

Even thought Jack Twist was dead he was with him not physically but emotionally he knew that he would feel warmer once he reach Jack’s shirt, once he feel for one more time that Brokeback scent. He ran until he stood as if heart-shot, his face turned grey and deep-lined, grimacing, his eyes screwed shut, his fist clenched, his legs caved, he hit the ground with his knees as the rain was falling down, the sky was crying the sky was crying for him.

He remembered something that he though was almost unreachable again, a time in a distant summer back in 1963 on Brokeback Mountain. He went behind Jack and pulled him close he was satisfied embracing that shared and sexless hunger.

They stood that way for a long time in front of the fire, its burning tossing ruddy chunks of light, the shadow of their bodies a single column against the rock. The minutes ticked by from the round watch in his pocket, from the sticks in the fire settling into coals. The stars bit through way heat layers little in the spark light and Jack leaned against the steady heartbeat, the vibrations of the humming like fain electricity and, standing, Jack fell into sleep that was not sleep but something else drowsy and tranced until him dredging up a rusty but still useable phrase from his childhood that his mother used to tell him before her death “time to hit the hay, cowboy. I got a go. Come on, you’re sleeping on your feet like a horse” and he gave a shake to Jack, a push and he singed for him an old song that his mother used to sing for him.

Ennis let his tears flow, if he only on that time hadn’t let Jack go all of this would had never happen. Ennis felt that all those years that he pained for Jack were stronger now. The fact that Jack was not with him anymore was clearer now. Ennis felt that he was nothing that he was dead.

Alma followed him with her car and when she saw him on the road on his knees horrified she came out of the car and hugged him in the rain.

“It’s ok, daddy, its ok!” she said caressing his hair, letting him cry, freeing his soul. As the water touched his skin Ennis fell all the pain and anger he had being hiding so far. He let his tears disappear with the water as it touched his body. He needed Jack Twist, but that was something that was not going to happen.

In his sadness he was unable to see clearly and when he looked at his daughter he didn’t saw his daughter, in fact he saw the person that he loved more in the world Jack Fucking Twist.

“Jack, ya’ came for me?” he cried, but then the image faded and he saw that was Junior the one holding him.

“No, Daddy it is only me yer daughter, but don’t worry I won’t let ya’ go come let’s go home you need to get a warm bath” she help his father to stand up and walked him to the car like a kid.

“What I’ve done” cried Ennis burying his face on his hands

“Ya’ didn’t did anything! Jenny is jest hurt that’s all she never expect this” Junior said to him caressing his face.

“Junior! How come ya’ are not ‘pset with me?” he asked looking at her.

“I was once, but I did understand that ya’ had yer right to choose yer life! I realized that no matter what happen ya’ always be my daddy” she smiled. they went to her house and she prepared some coffee and Ennis went to the shower when he came out he saw Alma Jr. and Kurt talking.

“So, yer mother told Jenny about yer dad? I never thought she was capable of being so evil” Kurt said, since he married Junior he lived a hell with Alma she always criticized every aspect of his life and his way of being. She told Junior he was no good, even though she knew that he was working hard and that he had given a good life to Alma Jr., Francine and Ennis Jr.

“Yes she did! I don’t understand how someone could be so evil! She is my mother and now I feel I hate her!” Junior cried.

“How is Ennis?” Kurt asked

“How do ya’ think? Jenny told him she hate him! How would you feel if Francine told ya’ that?” she told him trying to drink coffee. Kurt looked at the door thinking. He just stands up and walked to the fridge and took some chicken and put it in the oven.

“Since ya’ forgot to cook I tried to do it for ya’! Ya’ and Ennis need to eat!” he said, Ennis knew that Kurt really loved Junior, more now that he knew that he accepted the fact that Ennis loved Jack and seemed that he didn’t care, he always told him that he should move out with them because he don’t want him to be alone.

Ennis looked att his daughter preparing the tablehe wondered how his life would have being if he had accepted Jack proposal for living together, he never thought about it , until now just by looking at Alma and Kurt.

He entered the room, ate with them trying not to be sad. When they went to sleep he went out of the door and took a ride to his trailer, he thought that he should do something now, he thought that he should ask advice to someone that can help him. He didn’t want to hurt Jenny and he didn’t want to return to Riverton. He was unaware of all the things that were going to happen to him, some of them would made him cry and others would return the happiness that he thought he had lost long time ago.




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